The intention of this blog is just to share with you the way God works in my everyday life. I hope you enjoy!

Sunday, September 2, 2012

No Shoes, No Shirt, No (Church) Service?

It is 3:30 am, Sunday, September 2.  I cannot sleep!  Ugh!  What is up with that!?!  I haven't been able to sleep the past two nights, very odd for me.  Usually I have trouble waking up!  There are only a few days during the week that I have to set my alarm and get up at a certain time, unless I just want to.  Sunday is one of those days.  Actually, Sunday is the main day!  The rest of my week may change at any given time, but Sunday is the Lord's Day!  Sunday is a time of worship and reverence, fellowship and study, laughter and tears.  Sunday is my favorite day!  Always has been.  And, Sunday is the day that I get up the earliest.  I like to be up at 5am on Sunday.  That's only a little more than an hour from now.  In reality, I could get ready in a lot less time, but I like to take my time and enjoy the morning.  I like to not have to rush.  I don't want to enter the Lord's house like a chicken with its head cut off, rushing around with more concern over silly little things that really don't matter than what I'm truly there for.

I have loved Sundays since I was a little girl.  I was always more of a tomboy who liked to be outside, especially with my brother.  I would rather have on old clothes that were allowed to get dirty, and not have to worry about getting in trouble.  I would rather climb trees and get a little dirty than be a princess.  Even now, during the week, I always wear "work clothes" that can bear the stains ranging from anything outdoor or farm related to those popular housewife stains such as food, bleach, etc.  Nevertheless, come Sunday I am somewhat eager to be a little girly.  Nowadays, especially, I love putting on a dress, taking my hair out of its usual pony tail, and choosing carefully and purposely from my wide selection of fashion jewelry.  This is my favorite part of getting ready.  My ears have been pierced a second time, so I have two pairs of earrings to pick from, I need a bracelet or two, necklace, maybe a flashy ring, ankle bracelet and definitely a toe ring or two.  Haha!  Sometimes I wonder if people think I'm a contradiction to the scriptures.  I would argue that I am applying them.

 In 1 Timothy 2:8-10, it says:  I will therefore that men pray every where, lifting up holy hands, without wrath and doubting. In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.

I feel that these scriptures are related to being a true witness of Christ.  We are to let our life-not our flesh-speak of who we are.  John 13:35 says they will know that we are His disciples because of our love.  The above verses can be taken out of context and used to enforce people to be plain and basically to blend in.  I don't think that's what Timothy was saying.  I think he was saying by all means stand out in a crowd because you are a follower of Jesus Christ.  But, stand out in ways that give evidence of that, not in worldly ways.

Now that brings me to my argument that I am applying the scriptures. 

And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men;  Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ.  Colossians 3:23&24

I'm sure there are more verses that someone could give evidence that it is alright to adorn yourself with ornaments.  In fact, Isaiah 61:10 says:  I will greatly rejoice in the Lord, my soul shall be joyful in my God; for he hath clothed me with the garments of salvation, he hath covered me with the robe of righteousness, as a bridegroom decketh himself with ornaments, and as a bride adorneth herself with her jewels.  And, this verse kind of substantiates the point I am making.  I am going to the house of the Lord.  I am going to intentionally meet with Almighty God and His people, so I want to dress nicely.  In my life, there won't be any balls or fancy parties, and I'm glad of that.  The reason I celebrate is because of my Lord.

It's really funny how when I was a younger Christian, the last thing I wanted was to be noticed.  Even when I first got married, I only wore a wedding band.  As I have grown in Christ, my image of myself has changed.  I wouldn't say that I am totally confident in myself, but more accepting of myself.  I know that I am His creation.  I know that He makes all things beautiful.  In fact, I don't care if I draw attention-not in an immodest way-to myself because then maybe someone will then notice that it is His love radiating from me not just my earrings sparkling in the light.

One day, all Christians will be called up.  We will be the bride of Christ.  The bride.  Not the wife.  We will be adorned in white linen.  No matter if we feel we are not deserving of a pure white gown, He says that we are.  He will treat us with the love and tenderness of a newly wed bride.  He will have a gleam in His eye as He takes in our beauty and deems us worthy. 

In the mean time, we come to Him just as we are.  For me that would be with some stains of life on my garments.  And, He will make us white as snow.  In reality, it doesn't matter at all what we wear to church.  Tradition has us wanting to wear our best.  I personally think that there is nothing wrong with that tradition if it is for the right reasons in your heart.  If you want to look your best because you love church and you want to celebrate for the Lord, I think that's great.  If you hope to be noticed for your outward appearance, or too feel better than someone else, or to feel like you are doing God a favor, then that is not right at all.  You may fool the person sitting next to you, but God knows your heart.

Sometimes I wonder just where all this comes from.  I certainly had no intention of waking up at 2am.  I also didn't really figure on making a blog post today, whether at 2am or 2pm.  And, who in the world would've thought that the subject of church would've lead me to jewelry!?  Oh well.  Apparently, the Lord lead my fingers to type this for some reason, even if it was simply for my own benefit or just to make you laugh. 

Me on my way to church:  Just kidding!


Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Coming Back Around

I'm not sure if this is the longest I've gone without posting, if not, it's certainly up there.  It's not as if I have that many "followers" anyway, but I know my family enjoys the occasional look into my thoughts.  Haha!  Scary as that may be!

For awhile now, I have battled depression/anxiety/PMDD all those wonderful things that bring out a version of yourself that's you, but not quite.  A version that you don't really like and that bumfuzzles everyone else.  A version that you feel you should explain, maybe even defend, but at the same time you don't have the energy to do so, and don't really care if you do anyway.

So, for several months, I have been in a funk.  When I get like that, I don't really care to talk, write, listen, connect in any way to anyone.  I crave solitude as if it's my only link to sanity.  I avoid the things that I typically love to do and even the people that I normally love to be around.

I withdrawal.  I go somewhere inside myself where I am the only one who gets me, the only one who tolerates me, and the only one who wants to be around me.  My thoughts at the time....although not true.  My family will rack their brains, consult one another, and repeatedly ask me if I am alright or if they've done something to me.  I care that they are confused by my behavior, and want so much to not hurt them, but I don't have the energy to show that I care.  So, I withdrawal even more.

I don't like these times.  I feel useless.  I'm easily agitated and grouchy.  My only glimmer of hope is that I will come out on the other side, and hopefully with a lesson learned.  Hopefully those down times will leave me desperate for God and His true peace.  I feel now, that I am beginning to resurface.  I am coming up for air and hope to stay afloat for a very long time.

Only the Lord knows why these times are necessary for me and my faith walk, and I have to trust His will.  Maybe in the end, my journey will help someone else.  I hope what I've gone through at least brings Him glory.

Anyway....I hope it won't be long before my next post, and I want to apologize for the large gap.  Thankfully, I am coming back around.

Thursday, April 5, 2012

Miscellaneous Musings

It has been quite awhile since my last post.  It seems like once this year started, I had to run to keep up-or to try to keep up.  Ladies Bible Study started back up the first Monday in February, and my days have been full trying to prepare for each week's lesson.  I am also staring in the face of a rather long to-do list.  The projects I have planned seem to be endless.  Thankfully, I have at least started some of them, and there may be one or two that I've actually finished. 

There are so many other things going on inside me.  The devil has been on my case this 2012.  I seem to go from one spiritual battle to the next, with no down time.  I am somewhat thankful for that.  I must be considered a threat or else things would be smooth sailing.  Lord, I pray that I make you proud!  I am learning new things and that includes some bad things.  I am learning how to face those bad things and hopefully heal.  I want to be healed.  My heart has some open wounds that seem to never want to scab over.  If they do, it's not for long. 

On a better note, UK is once again the NCAA Basketball Champs!  WooHoo!  I am happy about that!  That was such a highlight to some otherwise, less cheerful days.  In the midst of it all, there was an escape from my personal reality to the world of BIG BLUE NATION where fans unite for the BLUE & the WHITE.  Where Anthony Davis is the "long arm" of the law and Terrence Jones gives his mean, tough, almost an "that's what I'm talkin bout Willis" face after he slams one home.  Where senior Darius Miller takes the floor and and thus defines "Miller time."  It's like watching a really great movie.  Each player is a character, and then there is Coach Cal who adds the comedy as he yells, gestures, jumps and pretty much dances along the sidelines.  As long as he does it all within the coach's box, it's all good.

Chase is now taller than his dad, and maturing more every day.  Where has the time gone?  When I look at that child I realize just how quickly this life flies by.  Like James says, our life is but a vapor. 

This Sunday is Easter.  My favorite service/holiday/time-of-the-year.  I feel so peaceful yet in such anticipation for Easter.  I think that is a true reflection of my Savior.  I am thrilled at the thoughts of my living Lord, saddened that He took on my shame and died for me, ecstatic that He died for me so that I might live with Him, giddy over a new dress and all the accessories, anxious to see what the Sunday service will hold, eager to celebrate what it all means-for the world and for myself as an individual. 

Easter to me is not just one Sunday morning with a brand new, floral patterned dress and matching earrings.  As I see the trees begin to bud and bloom and I smell the sweet fragrance in the air, it's all Easter.  It is all symbolic of Easter.  From the dead of Winter comes new life.  The fragrance in the air can resemble that of the fragrances used on the body of Christ.  Then, one morning, you wake up, and it seems as if all the earth is bursting with life again.  The trees that were gradually greening back up are fully back to life.  That reminds me of what it feels like when you finally accept Jesus as your Lord and Savior.  Suddenly, you are alive, radiating with color, drinking in the Son. 

Tomorrow I will go and help decorate for the Easter Egg Hunt.  I never really got the relation to eggs and Easter?  But, I will make one up.  The egg could represent the tomb, and the candy the prize inside.  Or, if they're real eggs, you think about that little chick breaking out to new life.  I have a friend that raises chickens.  He told me about how they need warmth to "come to life."  That even if the hen leaves her nest and a chick that hasn't fully hatched, as long as you can keep that baby warm, it will usually survive.  Once, when he was a kid, he found a chick that hadn't hatched all the way, and thought it was dead.  He threw the egg over the hill.  Once the sun came out, that little chick sprang to life with the warmth of the sun.  See where I'm going?  We just need the warmth of the Son to bring us to life.

Speaking of new life, we have seven new calves so far.  I would like to share their names, and the reason behind them.  First, we had a girl, West Liberty.  She was born the night that the tornado hit a neighboring town, West Liberty, and basically destroyed it.  So, she was named that to honor those effected.  Second, we had a bull calf, George Edward.  George Edward is my father-in-law's name.  On the day that the calf-who we call Jed for short-was born, his momma ended up rolling him into the creek as she tried to lick him clean.  Well, my husband and his dad attempted to get the calf out of the creek so that the lower temps of the night wouldn't kill it.  Amidst their efforts to save the calf, they faced a good, momma cow who was fighting for the same cause.  In her effort to protect her baby, she charged my father-in-law and knocked him flat into the creek.  That was a whole fiasco of its own that I may write about at another time.  So, needless to say, we named the calf after him.  It was the least we could do, considering.

Third.  I believe the third one was Lehigh.  If you are a basketball fan and watched the tournament, you will know that Duke was beaten out by a little no-name team, Lehigh.  Since 1992, UK fans all over the Bluegrass see the name Duke and their eyes squint with ferocity as flames of indignation heat their face.  If we see the name written down anywhere, we can't help but do this:  DUKE.  So, Lehigh was named in honor of Duke's defeater.  Haha!

Next, we have Brutus Patrick.  By this time, I am finding the name-game somewhat challenging.  So, the naming of this bull calf falls to my parents.  Since he was born close to the Ides of March and St. Patty's Day, he is thus named:  Brutus Patrick.

Another girl was born after that, and she was born...I believe it was the night UK beat Baylor, but I'm not certain.  Since Big Blue was reigning, my Mamaw suggested we name our latest addition, Little Blue.  So, Lil' Blue she is.

All of the calves up to this point are black, with the exception of Liberty, who is more of a deep brown.  The next calf was a black motley-face.  That means her face is white with black markings.  The naming of that one fell to our precious niece, Dara Mae.  Dara will be 7 in July, and her idea was to name it Carson if it was a boy, and Dara if it was a girl.  So, it being a heifer calf, we went with Dara.

This past weekend, we had Easter dinner with George's family.  In the midst of all that, number 7 was born.  One of George's cousins was there with his little girl, and we asked her if she would like to name this one.  She was so excited!  After studying on it a little while, she chose "Hershey."  Quite appropriate, don't ya think?

So, this random post in now going to end rather randomly.  Because that's all I got and because I'm hungry.  I think it was the mentioning of Hershey (the candy, not the cow) that made me realize I needed some breakfast.  So, off I go.